The Figure A Poem Makes ~ Robert Frost

The figure a poem makes.

It begins in delight and ends in wisdom.

The figure is the same as for love.

No one can really hold that the ecstasy should be static and stand still in one place.

It begins in delight, it inclines to the impulse, it assumes direction with the first line laid down, it runs a course of lucky events, and ends in a clarification of life – not necessarily a great clarification, such as sects and cults are founded on, but in a momentary stay against confusion.

It has denouement.

It has an outcome that though unforeseen was predestined from the first image of the original mood – and indeed from the very mood.

It is but a trick poem and no poem at all if the best of it was thought of first and saved for the last.

It finds its own name as it goes and discovers the best waiting for it in some final phrase at once wise and sad – the happy-sad blend of the drinking song.

No tears in the writer, no tears in the reader.
No surprise for the writer, no surprise for the reader.

For me the initial delight is in the surprise of remembering something I didn’t I didn’t know I knew.

I am in a place, a situation, as if I had materialized from cloud or risen out of the ground.

There is a glad recognition of the long lost and the rest follows.

Step by step the wonder of unexpected supply keeps growing.

The impressions most useful to my purpose seem always those I was unaware and so made no note of at the time when taken, and the conclusion is come to that like giants we are always hurling experience ahead of us to pave the future with against the day when we may want to strike a line of purpose across it for somewhere.

The line will have the more charm for not being mechanically straight.

We enjoy the straight crookedness of a good walking stick….
More than once I should have lost my soul to radicalism if it had been the originality it was mistaken for by my young converts.

Originality and initiative are what I ask for my country.

For myself, the originality need be no more than the freshness of a poem run in the way I have described: from delight to wisdom.

The figure is the same as for love.

Like a piece of ice on a hot stove the poem must ride on its own melting.

A poem may be worked over once it is in being, but may not be worried over into being.

Its most precious quality will remain its having run itself and carried away the poet with it.

Family Vacation In Texas & Louisiana from May 4 -14, 1990 (part 3 of 3)

by Rainbow Robin
age 16

Today, Thursday, May 10, 1990, we have been driving to Corpus Christi, Texas. We’re in the car right now. We stopped in this town called Buffalo. We saw a lady there who my mom had gone to junior high with in Arlington. The woman had her 12-year-old daughter with her who she had named Sonya after my mom.

I found out the other day that I am mostly Irish with some French in me, just like I thought, even though I never knew for sure. Gram hates the rain but, Aunt Norma Jean and Brandon like foggy days and rain like I do. Mamaw and Pap Pa (papaw) were both raised in Louisiana. She was born there and his family moved there from the east after they lost their Tennessee plantation during the war. Mimi thinks he may have been born in Arkansas but that the farm was in Tennessee. Our roots go way back in the south I suppose. Although on my Dad's side of the family they lived in New York state mostly after Ireland untill my Grandfather Fox moved the family to Dallas through his job with Kodak.

My Great-great-grandfathers name was Hezikeigh (Ezekiah) Eugene McGough. Pap Pa's name was Minor Leonard. Mamaw is Elsie Mae Gardner. Gardner is the French. Mom suggested that I name my someday son Giles Ezekiah. I kind of like it; I’ll keep it in mind.

Last night, on Thursday, we were supposed to drive to Corpus but it was almost 11:00 by the time we go to Austin, so we stayed at my Uncle Donny’s. I like their family a lot; their house is really comfortable. My cousin Amber Lynn is so cute and sweet. She’s just really gorgeous. She has these deep soulful eyes and sweet, long, thick, dark hair and is full of hugs and kisses. She draws a lot also. She has a book she colors in and wants to be an artist when she grows up. Her pictures remind me of mine when I was younger. Dawn says that Amber and I look alike in our faces.

Last night Mom, Donny and I were up talking. I got to hear some funny stories. I guess Ross has a band too and he wanted to do a jingle for one of Donny’s clients. So he called Donny and arranged it, but the company decided not to use them. Then a couple of months later Rhett decided he wanted to do a jingle also. So, he has his manager call Donny to ask about it. Donny told the manager that he could tell Rhett that he needed to call him if he wanted something from his uncle. That is so funny that Rhett had the nerve to do that but the thing is he probably just never thought about it.

This morning Donovan and Dawn came over for a while. Donovan really is a sweetheart. He has a really nice vibe. Dawn and I really got along well too. We have always been close even though we have always bickered. She is the cousin I feel the closest to.

I was talking last night with Jan about how interesting all my family is. I love my family so much, all of them, all my fathers, mothers, brothers, sisters (that includes you Erica, and everyone else), Aunts, Uncles, grandmothers, grandfathers and cousins. They all are trippy but I wouldn’t ask for anyone else.

I was talking last night about how the brothers are all little caricatures of Pop. All of them are very unique. They all have a little of his traits; more so in some than others. Ed is the intellectual, Randy is clever, Donny has heart, Scott likes to make sure things get accomplished and Jeb has a lot of his mannerisms. Jeb spent a lot of time with him and was with him when he died. Mom says Jeb has a lot of your spirit Pop.

After we talked about that I started thinking about you a lot. Pop, I love you so much. You are the only grandfather that I ever got to know and I never could have asked for a better one. You really brought all of our spirits and energies together like they were meant to be. We’re all here to help each other and you helped a lot. I love you so much; I know you’re with us. Thank you for everything.

Today is Monday and we are on our way home. I am sitting on the plane as I write this. Corpus Christi was nice. We arrived on Friday afternoon. Scott and Mimi were there. We didn’t do much. Mimi took Erin and me to Baubles & Beads. We had dinner with Mamaw, Mimi, mom, Erin & I. It was wonderful.

Saturday Erin and I went Mother’s Day shopping. We got mom one of those pigs that walks, then oinks and wriggles its nose. We go to ride on the same carousel that we rode last time we were here for Christmas.

When we got home Mimi was giving us all sorts of stuff. She gave me one of her cocktail dresses and a formal gown; the white one she had those pictures made in. What a lucky granddaughter I am.

Sunday morning we gave everyone their gifts. Everyone really enjoyed Mother’s Day. We went to the beach with Mamaw, at age 76 it was the first time in her life she had ever seen a beach. Then we all had brunch for Mother’s Day. It was so nice.

When we sent Mamaw home to Louisiana it was also her first time ever to fly on an airplane. Can you imagine?

I wish Mimi would slow down, but she never will because she doesn’t want to. I hope that I never get to be a perfectionist like her. It would stress me out. I bet she would be more stressed out if she wasn’t allowed to be a perfectionist.

That night I got to look at Mom Miller’s scrapbook and one she had made for Pop. All of the things from when Pop was first writing and drawing tripped me out because they were just exactly like any ones I have seen a little kid draw. They were no different because of the time period or anything. Everyone starts and ends. Pops letters and such were so cute. “Mom, can she? Huh-huh? Can she? Mom can she go? Please can she????????????????????? He weighed 9 pounds when he was born.

On the way to the airport Uncle Scott said to me that he was glad that I had grown up. I was always a beautiful person I just haven’t always been able to have the patience to show it in front of my family.

I met a girl, Amy, in the Dallas airport who also goes to College of the Redwoods. That’s how small Humboldt is, you usually see someone you know from there when you are flying home no matter how far away the airport you are at is.

Our family Vacation in Texas and Louisiana from May 4th - the 14th, 1990 (part 2 of 3)

By Rainbow Robin
Age 16


We got to Louisiana at about 11:30 at night. Aunt Norma Jean is so cute. I love her so much. She’s so hospitable, which made us feel right at home. Monday morning she made us biscuits from scratch with mayhaw jelly. Yum-yum!

Then mine and Erin’s third cousin Kalea came over. She’s in kindergarten. It was cool to play with her for a while, but I was really tired so I took a nap. Around sunset I wandered around with their dog JJ and took some pictures. It is so beautiful around here (Hail, LA.); very lush, very green with all sorts of different trees, plants, very complex ecosystems. You hear birds chirping, grasshoppers, locusts, and lots and lots of natural sounds.

There is a swing outside in the yard like you might have on a porch. I went out there while they were taking Mamaw back to the nursing home. It was the night before the full moon, so beautiful, so light that I could hear the earth breathing. I was soaking up the moon rays and being energized.

I wanted to write in my book so I went inside to get it. Erin and our second cousin Brandon were talking. I didn’t want to miss one of my opportunities to get to know him, so I sat down and started talking with them. He is so funny. We were all talking about how bad we are at sports. I realized that I get a lot of my wacky individualism from this side of the family. My lack of talent in sports is like Gram said once, “Since you don’t like sports it’s hard to believe you are related to us.” Well, I guess I get it from Mom’s family.

Then I went back outside and wrote for a while. It is so nice here. A lot of touching memories are happening. It is a real rediscovery of my roots, very cool. I like Brandon a lot, he is an artist and has been playing guitar for eight years. He gave my mom a beautiful drawing that he did of a dragon. Aunt Norma Jean is just as sweet as she can be. I LOVE HER A LOT. Seeing Uncle Potato was neat too. He works a lot though so I haven’t really gotten a chance to visit with him.

On Tuesday morning we had scratch biscuits and mayhaw jelly again. Then we went up to Mamaw and Papaw’s old land, where mom grew up. It’s a beautiful area up there. What I was amazed at, once again, was the diversity of plants and animals, which I didn’t really see much of but I sure could hear them. I see a lot of why mom is as balanced as she is. It’s amazing what growing up outdoors in a sweet place will do for you. It has been so nice for me to see a lot of the places that mom grew up in. She has been having a wonderful time.

Then we drove back to Norma Jean’s on all of these backwoods roads. I am glad we came here at a time in my life when I can really appreciate this because it’s mighty beautiful. It has been raining this afternoon. I’m really glad about that too. I would have terribly missed it if I hadn’t gotten to see rain at least once while I was away from home.

A lady came over this afternoon and asked me, “So, how do you like being in the sticks, not much to see, huh?” I replied, “No way, I am so happy to be here, it’s beautiful.” I guess she didn’t think I would think so because I am a child, but believe you me, I was so glad to leave Dallas. I mean, we got a lot of good things accomplished there, but I don’t like it there, it’s way to big. We saw Pop’s building where he lays, his cryptominium (another bad joke from my father).

I found some really neat rocks today. I’m going to give them away at home. I miss my friends a lot, but it is great to be away, just totally far away from everyone and everything and to just clean my system out. I feel really good and really happy. Also, very appreciative and I feel that way about Humboldt too. I love you everyone.

Today, Wednesday, we went to Aunt Kaye’s, she is really sweet. She fed us ‘dinner’ and cooked ‘supper’ for us also. She has the cute country home with lots of nick knacks. We visited there for a while and then I rode her bike around, a cute little 3-speed. First I rode to the bayou, took the bike off the road and sat by the water for a while. It was really nice and warm as well.

I found a round prickly ball which I later found out was from a sweet gum tree and that they’re all around here. There were also trees growing up out of the water. I then rode the bike around this loop by Aunt Kaye’s house through a very nice, lush, forested area. I ended up going the wrong way, but saw a girl to ask for directions. She was very nice. I met her momma and niece Jessica. She showed me a shortcut. Then on the way back, I biffed it on the gravel in someone’s driveway. I only scratched up my knee though.

My mom’s cousin Colby, who is a lot like my cousin because he’s 13, is a neat kid, really nice with manners. He was fun to be around. He and Erin got along. She says that they get along like her and Zach. Kaye gave us all a nice package with a shirt and some other stuff. They gave us some cotton too.

I drank a cola there and I think the caffeine really affected my attitude badly. I have been mean and stubborn since we got home. I was acting irritable to my mom about not wanting to pack up the back of the car. She’s like, “If you could just tell me why?” That is one thing that she has never understood; sometimes you just feel and want because.

Then Norma Jean was asking me about my hair and pulling the whole, “. . . oh your natural hair is so beautiful, why, why do you want to do that?” I got defensive and basically told her that I didn’t want to hear it, that it’s my hair and I’ll do what I want. I didn’t really think about it, it was a pretty normal conversation, one that I’ve had more times than I care to remember.

But then my mom comes in crying and saying, “You need to apologize to her”. I guess she was real offended by the way I talked to her and something I said about the food she ate after she tried to pull the natural trip on me. I guess NO kids around here talk to adults like that no matter what. Brandon had heard what I had said and he asked, “What do you feed me that’s bad, momma?”

I always manage to mess up something, don’t I? I’m just not used to the way people act around here and I have a big mouth. I am sorry. I don’t mean to offend people so much. I just always end up saying what I feel. Then I heard them saying how I was so much like Mimi, that I am so ornery like her. I hate it sometimes. Now things are a lot better. I still have to apologize to her, but she’s not mad at me, she was just upset. I usually have to cause at least one ruckus.

On another subject, I truly love Louisiana and have had a great time here but, I have noticed a real disrespect for the land. There is litter all over the roadsides and in the forests. My mom says it has always been like that, generation after generation. The rivers, lakes, and bodies of water I have seen have been very polluted. It seems kind of dirty, but on the other hand, Aunt Kaye and Aunt Norma Jean both recycle and do some other things. There is awareness it’s just not very widespread.

I have had a real emotion packed, wonderful trip in Louisiana so far. My mom has just been in heaven seeing so many of her childhood memories and a lot hasn’t changed around here, but a lot has and it was definitely a once in a lifetime experience for us all to share. I am glad that Jan came with us. It has been good for mom to have her cause Erin and I are brats.

Our family Vacation in Texas and Louisiana from May 4th - the 14th, 1990 (part 1 of 3)

By Rainbow Robin
Age 16


We arrived Friday at 5 p.m., very tired. My sister and I had stayed up until 2 a.m. the night before. We went out to dinner; then on to Gram’s.

Gram said that mannerism wise Jessica is a lot like me and that I had taken after my Aunt Patty. I felt what she was talking about. Jessica loves me a lot and I feel the same. Scott and I are still kind of like big sis and little bro. I like him a lot too.

It was very good to see Gram and Kathy. I always get a lot of love at their house. Even through their bewilderment. The house is the same. Lily and Candi (dogs) are still there. I got along well with those two also.

My dad is really generous to us. I love him and see that he is a good guy who is trying hard. Seeing his family makes me see some of my characteristics. It’s trippy to see family and see where you got it from.

Bodie, Clover, and Gloria met us at Gram’s. It was good to see them; it was great to see Bodie. There was a lot of affection between us. I was glad to see him out of that puberty stage against girls and know that he still loves me. He is very special to me; a real soul brother.

We went back to my dad’s and Erin went home with Clover. We didn’t go to bed until late that night. I smoked in front of my dad for the first time. He says to me, “So, you’re smoking now?” I said, “It looks like it doesn’t it?”

The next day he bought me a camera. I was very happy about that; it was a big deal. Then we went to get Bodie, Clover, and Erin. We didn’t do much all day, just farted around.

I went to Gram’s and visited for a while. It was beautiful to visit with all of them. Gram and I got to sit out on the front porch by ourselves and visit. I wish I could afford to take her to Ireland.

We met up with my Uncle Ed at my dad’s and then went to Deep Ellum to see Rhett play. His band is called Sleepy Heroes. They were really good, resplendent of Brent’s TV or Sweet Baby.

No one was dancing. My mom said the Dallas scene has always been like that. I was dancing in the back. Rhett even said something about wishing people would dance, so I took the brace off of my recently fractured heel and went to the front and danced.

I was the only one so I kind of danced in the corner though. I still managed to embarrass Erin and Clover a lot.

There was one girl dancing but towards the middle of the room, so I went and asked her to come up front and dance with me. She was happy to oblige. Then I was able to motivate a lot more people to dance.

Too soon after that their show was over. I was not ready to stop dancing so I said, “Encore, encore,” and got everyone into that. The bass player said, “I’m not going to say that this is our first encore, except that it is.” I think people in Dallas aren’t as loose about that kind of stuff. I just really needed to dance, vacations are hard!

Rhett gave me a real big hug after the show. Afterward we met him at his house on Miller Avenue. His girlfriend was there. She’s really nice. I was glad because with as many girls that must be after him he could have gotten a bad one. He has good taste though I am sure.

He lives with the guys in the band. We hung out for a few hours; it was really cool. They would like to check out Humboldt and play a gig here. That would be fun. Rhett also invited me to come and stay with him in Dallas some time. I felt a real connection with him. We must have hugged ten times before I left.

Then we went and stayed the night at Ed’s. He has a really hip pad with lots of neat stuff to look at and a ton of books. I had a good time there. Ed told me some good stories, he reminds me of Pop. I like him a lot.

Ed has a recording studio in his house. That is where Rhett does some of his recording. Uncle Ed is really proud of Rhett! He wants to help make him a star. It’s really good for Rhett that there is someone in the family who knows so much about promoting music. I just hope he doesn’t push him to hard. I guess that is what it takes to make it though.

Sunday we got a rental car, and on our way out of Dallas we stopped in Highland Park. I saw mom’s high school and the house she used to live in. It was weird, we drove around a corner onto Dartmouth and Jan looked at this one empty house and said, “Let’s move in there, it looks ready for us.” Mom looked at the house and said, “That was my house.” It was the one she lived in during high school; the one where she had her black room. Then we were off to Louisiana, I slept most of the whole way.

Peace to all

This is my first blog. I am so excited to finally be ready to put some writing out there to the rest of the world.

I just want to say,

"The more we separate ourselves from others, the more separate from ourselves we become"

I created that phrase but I am officially giving it to the universe because I think it is so important.

I will be posting more writing and pics soon.

Pray for my grandma Mimi!!